What comes next

I realize I’ve been a little M.I.A. lately, but I have a good excuse! I have started to use my organizing skills in a new way. As you may know, the grant that made my position possible at the San Francisco based Jewish Community Federation and Endowment Fund reached its successful completion early this spring. So, after many years, I left the work of advancing the lives of LGBT Jews in the very capable hands of Sasha T. Goldberg who is the Bay Area Director of Keshet (info).

I am still in the loop: I still serve on local committees for JCRC, NUJLS, and Keshet, proudly claim my membership at Sha’ar Zahav, as well as continue to be involved in the work of a variety of groups. After only a few months consulting outside of the Jewish community, I accepted a temporary position with the New Israel Fund as Interim Regional Co-Director while Becky Buckwald is out on maternity-leave through August. I am already deep into helping with the Annual Guardian of Democracy Dinner (info), shaping the logistics of NIF’s International Board Meeting and promoting local events such as Love, Hate and the Jewish State (info).

Working with the brilliant folks like Orli Bein, Steve Rothman, Daniel Sokatch, Penina Eilberg-Schwartz, Hannah Ellenson and Etai Freedman has already given me an incredible opportunity to engage with topics that I care about in a whole new context.
This new professional chapter for me has just started and already it has been incredibly rewarding. While I don’t know where I am specifically going to land again in September, I do know that I’d like to continue using my organizing skills for a cause I care about, but that could of course could be within a variety of areas.

I’m open to ideas and I want to hear from you! I’m excited to see what happens next! Much love and hope to see you soon!

 

trans remembrance shabbat

Since 1999, November 20th has been set aside in cities across the country as Transgender Day of Remembrance. This day memorializes those who have been killed due to anti-transgender hatred. High rates of murder and other violence continues to be one of the most critical issues facing our transgender communities; and more and more people, trans and non-trans, are raising their voices in commemoration and protest.

This Friday evening marks the sixth year that San Francisco’s progressive reform Congregation Sha’ar Zahav has stepped into the role of Jewish community caretaker for the annual sacred event of transgender Day of Remembrance (TDOR).

More and more people, trans and non-trans, are raising their voices in commemoration each year.

This particular evening, open to the greater community – both Jews and our Jewish allies, will be focused on remembering all who have suffered from anti-transgender violence.

The service beginning at 7:30pm led by Rabbi Camille Angel and Martin Rawlings-Fein will be focused in part on the holy act of remembering.

Together as a community we will read the names of those that have been murdered this year due to anti-transgender violence. As well as all of the unknown whom no one really knew the following names will be included:

♥ Idania Roberta Sevilla Raudales z”l, ♥ Luisa Alvarado Hernández z”l, ♥ Lady Óscar Martínez Salgado z”l, ♥ Reana ‘Cheo’ Bustamente z”l, ♥ Génesis Briget Makaligton z”l, ♥ Krissy Bates z”l, ♥ Fergie Alice Ferg z”l, ♥ Jessica Rollon z”l, ♥ Tyra Trent z”l, ♥ Priscila Brandão z”l, ♥ Marcal Camero Tye z”l, ♥ Shakira Harahap z”l, ♥ Miss Nate Nate (or Née) Eugene Davis z”l, ♥ Lashai Mclean z”l, ♥ Didem z”l, ♥ Camila Guzman z”l, ♥ Gaby z”l, ♥ Gaurav Gopalan z”l, ♥ Shelley Hilliard z”l

May each of these names be for a blessing. 

Related articles

• read more on trans remembrance day by martin rawlings-fein
• https://qjew.wordpress.com/2010/11/10/trans-remembrance/
• Official Transgender Remembrance Blog http://www.transgenderdor.org/?page_id=1663
• From shul to the mikvah, transgender Jews seek place in Jewish life (jta.org)
• Transgender Day of Remembrance (pinkbananaworld.com)
• Transgender Day of Remembrance (queerlandia.com)
• Emerson Whitney: Trans Representation in the Media (huffingtonpost.com)
• Happy to be a girl (connection-revolution.com)
• 13th Annual Transgender Day of Remembrance, 11/20 (uchicagolgbtq.wordpress.com)
• Remembrance Day (mrdavis10.wordpress.com)
• Rebecca Juro: Why Transgender Identity Matters (huffingtonpost.com)

 

An Orthodox Gay First?

Orthodox-ordained Rabbi Steve Greenberg presiding at same-sex wedding of Yoni Bock and Ron Kaplan in Washington, DC synagogue, 10 November 2011 (photo: Roee Ruttenberg)

Yasher Koach to chatanim (חתנים or grooms) Yoni Bock and Ron Kaplan!

Standing in matching kittle’s (קיטלנים or traditionally white linen robes that Ashkenazim are known to be buried in after wearing it to their wedding as well as annually on Yom Kippur to signify purity, holiness and new beginnings) and orange kippah’s (כִּפוֹת or platter-shaped head caps worn for respect) the two men stood under the chupah (a symbol of the home that the couple will build together) in Washington D.C. holding hands.

I understand from the blogsphere that many in the Orthodox tradition are dismissing the wedding as both of the grooms are men. Although no one has asked me my opinion on the matter here it is: of course it counts. The grooms were married in Washington D.C. by Rabbi Steven Greenberg, author of the 2004 groundbreaking book Wrestling with God & Men: Homosexuality in the Jewish Tradition. 

Related articles

• Out of all of the blog coverage on this possible Orthodox first my favorite post can be found here.
• Video clips from the wedding ceremony can be viewed on Roee Ruttenberg’s +972 blog.
• Click here to read the Jewish Journal’s profile of Rabbi Steven Greenberg.
• Orthodox Rabbi Officiates Same-Sex Wedding (lezgetreal.com)
• Orthodox Rabbi Matches Lesbians and Gays So They Can Have Some Babies (pinkbananaworld.com)
• Israeli rabbis launch initiative to marry gay men to lesbian women ­ (news4pk.wordpress.com)
• Orthodox Rabbi Matches Lesbians and Gays So They Can Have Some Babies (lezgetreal.com)
• Huffpost’s “15 Inspiring LGBT Religious Leaders”. Who’s Not on the List? (queeringthechurch.com)
• Areleh Harel: The Orthodox Rabbi Helping Gay Men to Marry Lesbians (time.com)
• Huffpost’s “15 Inspiring LGBT Religious Leaders”. Who’s Not on the List? (queeringthechurch.com)

 

countering the untrue

My colleague in Washington D.C., who like me works to break down obstacles in our communities paths to living Jewishly, responds to the article, “Bridging the gap between faith and sexuality” (WJW, Oct. 20) in the brilliantly written (and re-posted below) letter. This article that my colleague writes about seems to express a limited capacity as to the centrality of Judaism in the lives of many that are outside of a hetero-normative experience.

I too have a limited capacity to understand how the role of Judaism can not be central to my life. Proudly I am as Jewish as I am a proud Lesbian, American, Feminist and ally to identities that are created in the image of the divine, צֶלֶם אֱלֹהִים‎‎; t’zelem elohim, but are not my own. Judaism helps to make meaning of my life, help me understand the inexplicable and it gives me some structure to the chaos around me. This afternoon, the chaos around me can be read simply through the blatant disregard for LGBT Jewish identity in this passive Editors response to my colleagues letter, “WJW had no intention to take a position on this issue.”

This evening I am speaking on a panel hosted by Spectrum, Marin’s LGBT Center. We will be talking about how different religions handle biblical prohibitions against homosexuality and on the role religion plays in helping make meaning of our LGBT lives. I anticipate questions about how LGBT Jews continue to look beyond words written in Torah as well as how it is that so many LGBT Jews continue to love a community of cultural relevance, faith and spirituality when some continue to foster feelings of marginalization for LGBT Jews and our steadfast allies. I have a few answers to these questions, including boasting about how extraordinary our local Jewish Editorial staff is, but I would prefer to give them in person, so if you are up for a conversation please join us.

Meanwhile, read this letter as it has been ‘cut and pasted’ from wjw: “What GLOE works to counter everyday. As a proud member of both the Jewish and GLBT communities in Washington, I was hurt and outraged to find that Washington Jewish Week seems to state that these communities are mutually exclusive. As the director of GLOE, a program of the DCJCC, I know that they are not.

The article “Bridging the gap between faith and sexuality” (WJW, Oct. 20) stated “While the Torah strictly prohibits homosexual behavior” as a fact without question. Such a qualifier does a tremendous disservice to all GLBT Jews and undermines the effort to build a more inclusive community.

Jay Michaelson’s book, God vs. Gay?: The Religious Case for Equality, discusses the common misconceptions around this supposed biblical prohibition. Since this book, its author, and the surrounding program at the DCJCC were the topic of the article, I found it incongruous that the piece introduced Michaelson’s thesis with a dogmatic interpretation of the Torah. Even more importantly, the biblical imperatives towards love, community, justice, family, and saving a life, both vastly outnumber and outweigh any other verses one might “strictly” quote. WJW is an important voice in our community and the articles, images and words it chooses to print carry significance. That phrase, which betrays a bias toward exclusion, has repercussions throughout the community. I worry your readership will see this factually-stated interpretation and believe it to be true. Further, I am horrified to think of the closeted gay kids in our Jewish community whose parents receive this paper. Seeing an article in a Jewish paper that speaks to a gay and Jewish identity is a rarity for them. When they read beyond the headline, that “who you are is strictly prohibited in the Torah,” it only serves to shame them and to alienate them from Judaism – something GLOE works to counter every day.

Your statement was not just untrue – or even simply an unfortunate misphrasing – but rather, it highlights the bigotry that still exists within the Jewish community, and the lack of value placed on our lives as GLBT Jews. Haley Cohen, GLOE Kurlander Program for GLBT Outreach & Engagement Washington DCJCC”

 

Queer Jewish Students are invited to Washington D.C. for Leadership Conference

Participating student leaders from Universities across North America began calling this annual gathering a conference of the National Union of Jewish LGBTQQI Students. Naturally, an abbreviation written as NUJLS followed this long-winded title, giving us the name of the conference that we still use today, NUJLS (pronounced "NuJoules" (nüjau(-ə)ls)).

In the fall of 1998 the Office of Student Life at the University of Oregon received a notice in the mail about a student leadership conference aimed at empowering GLBT Jewish leaders. The Dean who received the memo called our local Jewish Student Union, LGBT Alliance and Hillel House to recruit someone to represent the University of Oregon at this conference called NUJLS. I was nominated, grant dollars were dispersed, I flew to Texas, met a dozen new friends and learned about Jewish community leadership. Just like that my career, as I write about in this blog, discovered its roots.

From my perspective one of the many barriers that people experience into the organized Jewish community was eliminated for me. Representing the University of Oregon as a Gay Jewish leader, gave me the opportunity as a young person to easily navigate into the depths of what our Jewish community has to offer.

Each Spring since 1997, Queer Jewish University-level students, as well as our steadfast LGBT allies, have joined together on a selected University campus to learn from each other for a weekend Shabbaton affectionately called NUJLS. Each year NUJLS features speakers, text study, and workshops on topics such as Judaism and queerness, activism, relationships, ethics, coming out, and time to talk about our differing views on how students think about Israel. NUJLS provides an opportunity for student leaders from Universities across North America to build community, network and become more familiar with Jewish life.

This February at American University in Washington D.C. students will be able to hear from galvanizing speakers, share shabbat meals and participate in leadership workshops all the while fostering in the next generation of connected and inspired LGBT Jewish leaders.

As an alumni of NUJLS and now a proud board member I am asking my networks to help me spread the word on campuses and in your greater communities about NUJLS. Learn more!

Related Links

• Visit the NUJLS Website!
• Top 10 LGBT Websites and Blogs
• This is a gender neutral restroom.
• Dr. Frank Kameny, Jewish Gay Rights Pioneer, Dies At 86
• finding the community that works for you
• breaking barriers
• shout out today: tomorrow is a day of silence
• The DCJCC GLOE Blog at 16th and Q
• Bet Mishpachah – Mishpachah Matters
• Gayim DC, a yahoo group for Jewish Gay, Bisexual and Trans identified men
• Nice Jewish Girls of DC, a yahoo group for Jewbians
• Out Gay Hillel Students at American University in DC: Oy J!
• Annual DC Metro Area GLBT Studies Symposium: Scholarship to Activism
• Spectrum Advisor Project
• A 2011 Guide to GLBTA Life at American University
• Jason Benkendorf named ED of American University Hillel
• countering the untrue (qjew.wordpress.com)

 

This is a gender neutral restroom.

We speak about removing barriers for people often at my work in the organized Jewish community. These barriers we speak about can often mean finances but they can easily be much simpler and much more tangible. These barriers can be a physical or mental block that keeps someone in the margins not able to get access to what our Jewish community has to offer.

Here is a barrier that we don’t speak about a lot in the organized Jewish community: restrooms. Many people have no safe places to go to the bathroom. It is true! Ever wonder about the gender of that long-haired person in the men’s room or that short-haired person in the woman’s room? Imagine the looks that they get each time they simply have to go to the bathroom because their gender presentation does not fit the mold of other people around them. Many people avoid public bathrooms altogether because these looks can quickly turn into harassment.

A copy of the sign that you can see in this blog is now hanging on our third floor outside of a restroom that was once reserved solely for use by men. A few years ago we put up a sign that simply said “gender neutral” but guests in our building kept referring to it as the “transgender bathroom.” This awkward phrasing that was being used started to create an even more isolating experience for both guests and employees. So together with two of my colleagues we were able to craft this updated sign.

I don’t always know how to honor each one of our community’s micro successes in the LGBT inclusion work that I do. We do not even know yet if this new sign can be seen as a success. I simply hope that this sign and story can present an opportunity to shape the way we can see things differently as a community.

I am aware that we need to share these moments of change to help other communities take similar steps towards greater inclusion. So if you have a suggestion on a success that you have experienced, please share it!

If you are looking for more gender neutral bathroom resources take a look here:

• Safe2pee – a collective of like-minded activists offering resources to find safe places to use the bathroom and activism to promote gender free public restrooms
• Toilet Training – a documentary video and collaboration between transgender videomaker Tara Mateik and the Sylvia Rivera Law Project. Using the stories of people who have been harassed, arrested or beaten for trying to use bathrooms, Toilet Training focuses on bathroom access in public space, in schools, and at work.
• Toilet Training Toolkit – a companion toolkit full of useful facts and talking points about trans equality and bathroom access
• Peeing in Peace – a resource guide created by the Transgender Law Center combining basic information about how someone can protect themselves with common sense steps that can be taken to change the way in which an employer, school administrator, business owner, or government official handles bathroom access issues
• West Coast LGBT Training Institute for the Jewish Community – The purpose of the training is to make sure that LGBT youth, families, and staff are safe and affirmed in all Jewish educational and community settings. Participants will be trained and given the tools and guidance to replicate the trainings in their own communities.

Related articles

• The Little Zeus’s Room (bilerico.com)
• University students push for gender-neutral washrooms (ctv.ca)
• UCLA To Make Co-Ed Roommates An Option For Transgender Students? (huffingtonpost.com)
• Gender-neutral passports a possibility (pinkbananaworld.com)
• California Passes Two Historic Transgender Laws (huffingtonpost.com)
• Indonesia’s transgender couples surrounded by fear and persecution (guardian.co.uk)
• No, this isn’t really the way to include transgender people (feministphilosophers.wordpress.com)
• LGBT Book Readings at the Jewish Community Library (qjew.wordpress.com)

 

do you have a purple scarf?

Thursday, October 20, 2011 is Spirit Day! Please wear just a touch of purple to support young people dealing with bullying tomorrow. Sure, it is a bit weird to randomly wear purple as an adult... but, as Dr. Seuss famously said, “life’s a little weird…”. Please go with it by finding an old purple scarf or hat and put it on… By wearing purple tomorrow you are telling young people in our communities that you are a safe person to speak with about their experiences with bullying…

Related Posts

• Religious Voices Supporting Spirit Day (GLAAD.org)
• Facebook’s Going a Little Gay for Spirit Day (mashable.com)
• Jewish Community Federation and Endowment Fund of San Francisco, urging people to go purple (JewishFed.org)
  
• We’re Going Purple on October 20: You Should Too (bilerico.com)
• Put on Some Purple For Spirit Day (bellasugar.com)
• ‘Jersey Shore’ Star Vinny Teams Up With GLAAD (mtv.com)
• Why Facebook, Yahoo & others are celebrating LGBT Spirit Day (venturebeat.com)
• Celebrate Spirit Day on October 20th by wearing purple (queerlandia.com)
• Celebs And Corporations Are Waving Their Spirit Fingers For #SpiritDay! (perezhilton.com)
• Why Did GLAAD Pick Purple As The Color To Wear For Spirit Day? (queerty.com)
• Wear Purple to Support LGBT & Bullying on Spirit Day (997now.radio.com)
• Will you join me and pledge to go purple in support of LGBT youth? (qjew.wordpress.com)

 

LGBT Book Readings at the Jewish Community Library

Reconciling queerness with religion has always been an enormous challenge. When the religion is Orthodox Judaism, the task is even more daunting. The anthology Keep Your Wives Away from Them, edited by Miryam Kabakov, takes on that challenge by giving voice to lesbian, bisexual and transgender Jewish women who were once silenced—and effectively rendered invisible—by their faith. It tells the story of those who have come out, who are still closeted, living double lives, or struggling to maintain an integrated "single life" in relationship to traditional Judaism.

How can transgender people live pious Jewish lives when many of their significant life choices might be considered “un-kosher”? How might parenting be complicated, or perhaps, enhanced, when one parent has changed sex? How does it feel to be in “men only” ritual space when you were once defined by your community as female? Balancing on the Mechitza is an anthology by activists, theologians, and scholars, both transgender and non-transgender allies, who share their interpretation of Jewish texts about ambiguous bodies, as well as their sacred and secular stories

                                                                                                                                     

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 

                                                                                                                                                               Both readings are free and open to the public at the San Francisco Bureau of Jewish Education (BJE) Jewish Community Library. The library is located at 1835 Ellis Street, San Francisco, 94115, between Scott and Pierce on the campus of the Jewish Community High School. There is free garage parking at the entrance on Pierce Street between Ellis and Eddy. For more information contact Allison at (415) 567-3327, ext 703 or ajgreen@bjesf.org.

Related articles

• Top 10 LGBT Websites and Blogs (qjew.wordpress.com)
• Tuesday night: Meet me in Marin Co! (jewishexperienceonline.com)
• Meiselman Revisited: reflections on Orthodox feminist literature (haamnews.wordpress.com)
• gays have kids too (qjew.wordpress.com)
• Chinese Jews Feel More At Home In Israel (huffingtonpost.com)

 

Dr. Frank Kameny, Jewish Gay Rights Pioneer, Dies At 86

Dr. Frank Kameny lived many of his 86-years as an out activist, leader and hero. It is with only a blessed form of irony that he left us today, on National Coming Out Day. May Frank’s memory be for a blessing. To understand our LGBT American history please get to know a bit more about his story. Our history and our civil rights seemed to be paired perfectly with Frank Kameny’s once radical notion that we have a right in this country to stand up for, “First Class Citizenship for Homosexuals.” Right on, brother.

Some of Frank Kameny's z"l donated picket signs and buttons are on display as part of an exhibit at the National Air and Space Museum where they are on loan from the Smithsonian National Museum of American History. The signs read, "First Class Citizenship for Homosexuals" and "Discrimination Against Homosexuals Is As Immoral As Discrimination Against Negros and Jews."

Dr. Frank Kameny z"l marching with the Mattachine Society of Washington D.C.

First coined by US Politcal candidate Frank Kameny z"l in 1968, someone else added the word "so" to the original graffiti. Perhaps a reflection of that person's opinion on how far gays have come since 1968... Thank you Frank.

Related articles

• Frank Kameny, Gay Rights Pioneer, Dies At 86 (huffingtonpost.com)
• Grandfather Of LGBT Rights Movement Frank Kameny Passes Away At 86 (lezgetreal.com)
• Frank Kameny, R.I.P. (volokh.com)
• Pioneering gay activist Frank Kameny dies at 86 (miamiherald.typepad.com)
• Gay rights pioneer Kameny dead at 86 (cnn.com)
• Frank Kameny, gay rights pioneer, dead at 86 (seattletimes.nwsource.com)

 

Outing Rabbi Eger

Rabbi Denise Eger believes that activism is an important part of her rabbinate. She is now the historical leader recognized for the 2011 Coming Out Day. Mazel Tov, Rabbi Eger!

In California, we are fortunate that we have become the first state in the nation to require public schools to add lessons about our gay and trans history to social studies classes. Yet, this only happened after Governor Jerry Brown signed this landmark bill a few months ago created by LGBT Jewish leader Mark Leno (learn more).

Therefore because our LGBT history is not being taught and talked about much, the month of October has become LGBT History Month. The goal of this month is to send a consistent message about the vital importance of recognizing and exploring the role of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people in American history.

Starting in 2006, a nonprofit group called Equality Forum has promoted 1 of 31 chosen LGBT History Month Hero’s or Icons each day in October. Throughout the short history of this tradition 18 Jewish leaders have been recognized. These LGBT Jewish Icons are: Susan Sontag z”l*, Annie Leibovitz, Leonard Bernstein z”l, Larry Kramer, Lowell Selvin, Barney Frank, David Geffen, Harvey Milk z”l, Maurice Sendak, Leslie Feinberg, Suze Orman, Joan Nestle, Magnus Hirschfeld z”l, Allen Ginsberg z”l, Tony Kushner, Harvey Fierstein, Stephen Sondheim and Aaron Copland z”l.

This year marks the 6th Anniversary of this work by the Equality Forum and today is the unveiling of the 19^th Jewish LGBT leader to be listed. Today, on Coming Out Day, which falls annually on October 11, Los Angeles based Rabbi Denise Eger has been chosen as the LGBT hero or icon of the day. Her bio and story can be seen here.

Mazel Tov, Rabbi Eger! Thank you for being an inspiration to so many people throughout both our Jewish and LGBT worlds!

Related articles

• LGBT History Month honors Ricky Martin, Wanda Sykes, Ryan Murphy, Pedro Zamora, 27 other icons (miamiherald.typepad.com)
• Will you join me and pledge to go purple in support of LGBT youth? (qjew.wordpress.com)
• LGBT History Month 2011 Website Launch (queerlandia.com)
• Philadelphia Freedom: The Dewey’s Lunch Counter Sit-In (queerty.com)
• Mayor Nutter to Kick Off Lgbt History Month (cityofphiladelphia.wordpress.com)
• gays have kids too (qjew.wordpress.com)
• October is LGBT history month (queeringthechurch.com)
• Top 10 LGBT Websites and Blogs (qjew.wordpress.com)

In 2006, Equality Forum began providing content, promotion and resources for LGBT History Month. Now, LGBT History Month celebrates the achievements of 31 lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender Icons. This is a selection of the 19 LGBT Jewish icons that have been honored and recognized by Equality Forum among the 186 LGBT Icons choosen since 2006.

* There are several traditional Jewish honorifics for the dead which are used interchangeably when naming and speaking of the deceased. The most common honorific is translated from the Hebrew into English to mean, of blessed memory. In Hebrew this honorific is written זיכרונה לברכה\ זיכרונו לברכה  (Hebrew transliteration is zikhrono livrakha/zikhronah livrakha). As seen frequently on this blog the use of this honor is further abbreviated to the first two letters of the Hebrew transliteration words, z”l or the first two letters of the Hebrew wordsז״ל.